The Calm of the Storm.

SHIT

So… I believe my boyfriend just checked my tumblr. I wouldn’t care at all except that he probably thinks my last post is more important than it is. I love him to death and we keep getting in these fights. We’ve been doing pretty good recently, but somehow I magically fuck it up all the time. I think that tomorrow’s gonna be tough if I get to talk to him because he’ll probably bring this up… I forgot I even made that post and now that I think about it I probably shouldn’t have, but it was one of those in the moment things… I like attention and I like that band… I really hope this doesn’t turn into another fight. I brought this on myself, but we both know we can’t take much more of this. I just want us to work out without either of us doing something that’s going to bother the other… I barely get on here anymore. And maybe I should just make that a never so it can’t start shit…. Not that this is tumblr’s fault or anything… :/

29 May

#fight #bother #pissed off #tumblr #boyfriend #band #stupid #post

Losing

So… I almost lost one of the most important people in my life today. No, he didn’t almost die… He almost broke up with me. Or maybe it wasn’t as close as it felt like it was, but either way he started the conversation by saying that “we can’t do this anymore.” I’m glad we talked for the last 2 and a half hours and that he decided against it because apparently he didn’t want to break up anyways, he just was frustrated and upset and taking his friend’s advice. All they ever talk about is negative things from their lives, so she doesn’t know any of the good things. All she sees is that if we stay together she thinks we’re going to head down a dark path. He said that he didn’t want to break up, but the recurring dreams he’s been having have been getting to him a lot. My eyes burn from all of the tears shed tonight (and I’m also hungry, so my tummy is grumbling), but I’m going to pee, brush my teeth, and go to bed. Tonight has been an emotionally draining night…

On another note, I forgot to sign my time sheet at work tonight, so I’m going in at opening tomorrow to hopefully finish filling it out and sign it before I get bitched at by our assistant manager. Last time I forgot she called me at like 9:30am yelling about how she wouldn’t pay me and how much trouble it is for her to count up my hours, etc etc blah blah blah. Anyways, hopefully I can avoid that and beat her to the punch tomorrow. I REALLY hope she’s not the one opening tomorrow or at least that I get there before her. I REALLY hate having to see her/be around her. She kinda scares me and really makes me uncomfortable. No one likes her and she’s really bad at her job (borderline doesn’t do it because she puts everything off on all the other employees… LAZY).

But goodnight and wish me luck in all of my life’s ventures for the next little while. Thanks :]

14 May

#boyfriend #arguing #crying #work #bitching #fighting #break up #hungry #conversation #mornings #talking #hope

I Don’t Know If I’m Just Clingy…

I mean would it bother you if you went for a week barely talking to your significant other and not seeing them at all? Am I clingy or is it right of me to miss him? I hate that he told me he doesn’t like clinginess and that he likes to take a couple to a few days off to just spend some alone time and do his own stuff. I can’t blame him for not wanting to be suffocated, but I can only hope that I’m important enough to talk to at least once a week. I’ve been worrying a lot about our relationship recently and I don’t want that to amount to anything. Relationships shouldn’t be painful though. They should bring happiness. I’m not trying to put him on a pedestal and say that he needs to be perfect. I know he’s under stress, but I want him to be able to talk to me about it… I want to show him I care. I want us to push past all of our problems together… Is that too much to ask?

09 May

1 note

#missing #him #upset #clingy #lonely #problems #relationships #love

Bleghh

I just spent the past hour remembering things I wish I’d forget, looking through pictures I shouldn’t care about, and creeping a profile I don’t even need to be on… I hate when I randomly start missing people. It just brings me down. I don’t have work for the next few days. I hope I get to do something fun. Sitting at home is depressing…

09 May

#missing #bored #sad #lonely #tired

makeawishfor2012:

Wish by: http://little-obscurity.tumblr.com

30 April

1,505 notes

This photo was reblogged from makeawishfor2012 and originally by makeawishfor2012.

I do this sometimes. It always takes me forever to get back to liking a band because they make good music after a breakup. Certain bands or songs still hurt a little…. :/

30 April

3,149 notes

This photo was reblogged from slowlyspreadingmywings and originally by justgirlythings.

Full picture is WAYYYY TOO BIG!, but this is something I need to work on for me.

30 April

37,594 notes

This photo was reblogged from slowlyspreadingmywings and originally by dailyreasontobehappy.

I’m committed when I’m in a relationship.

I won’t cheat on you.
I won’t do you wrong.
I won’t want to stop talking to you.
I wont want to leave you for anyone else.
I won’t do anything to hurt you.
I chose you & that means I only want you, no one else.

the truth.

30 April

23,543 notes

This text was reblogged from slowlyspreadingmywings and originally by sandraahlove-deactivated2012010.

Hopefully this will be my saving grace for college…. I’m gonna need a lot of it, I know.

30 April

16 notes

This photo was reblogged from slowlyspreadingmywings and originally by im-grateful-for.

#financial #aid #grateful #college

Quote

Because of a quote… I now feel like I should read “The Perks of Being a Wallflower”.

Too bad “Salvage the Bones” has to come first for school…. but it’s ok. I’m hoping I’ll like that one too.

30 April

2 notes

#books #reading #The Perks of Being a Wallflower #Salvage the Bones